1. The client has all the answers.
Coaches never give advice or suggestions, right?! Many coaching purists believe this to be true. They believe they just need to ask the right questions and the client will figure out the answer.

If the client had all the answers, why would they need a coach? While an effective coach will have the skills to elicit many answers from their client, sometimes the client just does not have the answer. If they’ve hired you for your expertise on a topic or with a situation then you probably know the answer or solution they need, or could consider, in that moment.

When I first started coaching I was faced with this situation. I was working with a client who was having a challenge with fitness and weight loss. Having been taught that the client had all the answers, I was hesitant to give her suggestions based on my years as a fitness and strength training consultant. Yet it seemed ridiculous to me to have her try to figure out the answer on her own. I realized in that moment that I could ask her questions until she hopefully arrived at an appropriate solution or I could ask her if I could share what I knew from my previous experience as a fitness consultant. She opted for the latter.

As a coach you may need to wear different hats. You can ask the client if it’s ok for you to put on your consulting or mentor hat when you feel it is needed.

2. All the learning takes place during the coaching call.

As a new coach you may think that the client needs to get a big ‘ah ha’ during the coaching call in order for the session to be a success. Learning often happens in the space between coaching sessions when the mind has had time to process the call.

Think about a time you were faced with a challenge. You may have talked with a friend, colleague or family member about it and they may have offered some solutions. Yet none of the solutions felt right. Then you’re out for a walk or in the shower and voila – the answer flashes right before your eyes. Same concept.

You just need to coach during the session. Don’t worry about getting the person to some place. If that’s your focus, then two things may be happening. One – your ego is in the coaching relationships. Two – you may fear that a client will drop you if they don’t get an ‘ah-ha’ each session. Two things you can work on with your coach.

3. You need to be your client’s friend.

You’ve probably read articles stating that hiring a coach is like paying someone to be your friend. Would you really want a friend or family member to coach you? Think about it. Our friends and family will be affected, for example, if we want to change our high-paying career for one that is more fulfilling but pays less. How can they coach you from a non-attached place? For the most part – they can’t. They have a personal agenda, knowingly or unknowingly.

Does your client want you to be their friend? Some may. What your clients need is for you to be willing to risk not being liked in order to support them. They need you to ask one more question when it gets uncomfortable, something a friend may not do. You may be the only person in their life who will tell them a hard truth or to hold them to a higher standard or vision of themselves. A coaching session may be the only time a client gets heard.

If you are your client’s friend, you may develop a personal agenda for them, which interferes with your coaching.

In summary, it’s beneficial to question your perceptions or beliefs about coaching. If someone tells you that this is the way it’s done, ask for the reasoning behind it. Perhaps they do it that way because another way was never tried.

Related Post: 3 Myths about Becoming a Coach

A myth, as defined by the Merriam-Webster dictionary, is “a popular belief or tradition that has grown up around something or someone.”

For instance, you may have heard the story about the women who cut off the ends of the ham before she baked it. Her husband asked her why she did it that way and she replied “that’s the way my mother did it.” When she asked her mother why she cut the ends off the ham, her mother said “my pan was too small so I had to cut off the ends to make it fit.”

The Cost of Believing a Myth…

If you believe a statement or way of doing things is based in fact or truth, when it’s actually a myth, you may follow a less than optimal way of doing something. If you don’t question the statement or way, you may use it as an excuse for why you can’t do something.

For example, if you think you’re too young or too old to be a coach, you may let that stop you from exploring the profession further. If you believe the first myth, listed below, you may be disappointed or think you’re a failure if you don’t build your business quickly, quit your job prematurely, or budget inappropriately.

Three Myths About Becoming a Coach:

1. I just have to hang my ‘coaching’ shingle out and my business will fill up quickly.

This may be true for Oprah, Ellen and other famous people with huge followings or for marketing and sales experts, but not for the average person.  Coaching is a business.  According to Industry Canada¹, 85.3% of micro-enterprises (1-4 employees) created in 2001 survived for three years and 70.4% survived for 5 years.  However, only 55% of businesses started in 2001 with revenues less than $30,000 survived three years.  The U.S. Small Business Administration² states that “two-thirds of new employer firms survive at least two years.”

Coach and author Stephen Fairley interviewed 300 coaches in order to write his book “Getting Started in Personal and Executive Coaching.” He found that 73% of new coaches made less than $10,000 in their first year, which makes the above statistics more sobering.

Most businesses fail due to lack of money, lack of management experience and lack of planning³. If you’re serious about earning a living with your own coaching business, you need to learn how to operate a successful business – including sales and marketing – or find someone to do that for you. This is especially true for those who have been an employee receiving a steady paycheck in exchange for working a set number of hours from an employer. Self-employment is a vastly different mindset.

2. A coach training school will teach me everything I need to know about building a thriving practice.

The amount and depth of practice building instruction and support you will receive from a coach training school varies. Some schools focus mainly on teaching and supporting you to master the skills of coaching while others focus equally on teaching coaching and business building skills. Even if you choose an ICF accredited coach training program, you need to figure out which ones offer the level of practice building components or modules you need.

If you’re set on taking a coach training program that does not offer sufficient business building instruction or support, figure out an alternative way of learning the business side of things. You may be able to find local programs via the school board or college. Many entrepreneurs, including coaches, offer business building programs. If you choose the latter, find out if the leader built a profitable business outside the “teaching entrepreneurs and coaches how to build a business” niche first.

3. I need to complete a coach training program before I can start coaching.

There are no current regulations requiring you to have coach training or certification in order to coach. However, clients come to you to get results. Learning and mastering coaching skills can help you support your clients more effectively.

Most coach training schools encourage you to start coaching right away so you can practice what you just learned. You coach as you learn. Take a coaching course and use the skills you learn with your clients. Then take the next coaching course and use those skills with your clients.

In Summary…
These are three common myths about coaching. If you have any perceptions about becoming a coach or building a coaching business, question them to find out if they’re true.

Sources:
1. Key Small Business Statistics – January 2009
2. U.S. Small Business Administration – FAQ’s (#7)
3. Five Creative Ways to Start a New Small Business in a Turbulent Economy (PDF)